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Old 04-27-04, 02:30 PM   #21
jester
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Default How?

How Did Mike Wood ruin your birthday party?
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Old 04-28-04, 01:59 AM   #22
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Embarrassed

Probably the same way he split up my family...
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Old 04-28-04, 08:33 AM   #23
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Ass

Mike Wood sends me dirty pictures of himself.
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Old 04-28-04, 11:59 AM   #24
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Which you are unable to sell on the internet I presume
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Old 04-28-04, 01:07 PM   #25
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Mike Wood (if that is his real name) was hired to paint faces and make balloon dogs at my birthday party (which he really wasn't good at) and after drinking all of the beer in the fridge ended up on the rec room sofa with my mum. She has never been the same since.

Kim...does that sound familiar?

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Old 04-28-04, 03:18 PM   #26
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Bloody Canadians. Live in Big Houses with Rec Rooms and have large refrigerators because their country covers about one third of the Northern Hemisphere.

They get so liberal and hospitable and then wonder why people drink their beer and sit on their sofas.

However, I sympathise. Once had an idiot called Jack Russell perform at my comedy club. The bastard turned up drunk, and instead of entertaining just pissed everybody off.

What did he do with your mum though?
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Old 04-29-04, 11:57 AM   #27
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Jester...

Just because you drink your beer at room temperature, I don't think you have any right criticising "our" Canadian fridges. You sound just like Mike Wood!

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Old 04-29-04, 01:03 PM   #28
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I did not criticise your fridges. I'm bloody envious because we don't have the space for big fridges here in UK but I did not criticise the Fridge.

I did not compare your fridge to Mike Wood or to Jack Russell.

If your fridge is in anyway offended by my emails I apologise unreservedly. If this apology does not satisfy your fridge the fridge can register as a member of Pnet and report my posts to Jim.

DO NOT COMPARE ME TO MIKE WOOD!

I don't know the guy but I don't think you would ever find me on your couch, drunk having painted your kids faces badly. I know I don't paint faces and I don't do it.

I can't say whether I would want to share a couch with your mum or not, but if she is going to canoodle with Mike Wood I think pride might get in the way of any other attraction.
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Old 04-29-04, 01:14 PM   #29
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Thumbs Up Mike's Wood

Hey now....last year at the Edmonton Festival, Mike Wood bought me some really nice scotch AND laughed unnecessarily long and hard at each and every one of my borderline at best drunken witticisms. He seemed really sincere. At least he wasn't trying to suck up like Mr. Silly. And speaking of which - neither Mike Wood or I can help it that your mom is so damn hot - next time tell her to cover up a little bit fer cripes sake.

yr
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Old 04-29-04, 11:55 PM   #30
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Mike Wood just sent me an offensive image!!!

P.S. - I bought Phil's Mom a fridge magnet because she's so hot!
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Old 05-05-04, 08:46 AM   #31
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Mike wood sounds like matthew lilliard in "scream" when he get's excited.I've also have some offense taken when asking ukranians about their breakfasts now,they don't seem to understand.But he is not a jack russell,maybe a jackass.
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Old 05-27-04, 11:32 AM   #32
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Hey Al,

Did Mike's Mum teach you that pose?
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