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Old 07-02-09, 02:00 AM   #21
Stephon
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How about, "Go with God but leave your money with me"?
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Old 07-02-09, 02:02 AM   #22
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Quote:
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How about, "Go with God but leave your money with me"?
Beautiful.
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Old 07-02-09, 03:26 PM   #23
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Lightbulb Do you believe this shit?

Taoism: Shit happens
Confucianism: Confucius say, “shit happens”
Buddhism: If shit happens, it isn't really shit
Zen: What is the sound of shit happening?
Hinduism: This shit has happened before
Islam: If shit happens, it is the will of Allah
Jehovah's Witness: Let me in, I'll tell you why this shit happens
Protestantism: Hope this shit happens to someone else
Judaism: Why does this shit always happen to me?
Catholicism: If shit happens, you deserve it
Agnosticism: What is this shit?
Atheism: I don't believe this shit
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Old 07-02-09, 04:35 PM   #24
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AMEN!!!!!!!!

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Old 07-03-09, 01:04 AM   #25
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"They say that Jesus died for your sins. I'm just doing it for your entertainment dollar".

I really wish I'd thought of that first.
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Old 07-03-09, 08:34 AM   #26
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Satan commands you to pay me now.
works for me.
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Old 07-03-09, 04:36 PM   #27
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Butterfly Before you go you must ask yourseives...

What would Jesus give?
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Old 07-04-09, 12:13 AM   #28
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probably some crap like "everlasting life."

well, i'll take a fiver, thank you very much.
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Old 07-04-09, 01:16 AM   #29
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Quote:
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What would Jesus give?
Small change; he holds out a fist full of coins and anything smaller than a quarter just falls thru the hole.
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Last edited by Stephon; 07-04-09 at 01:20 AM. Reason: rewrites
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Old 07-05-09, 11:24 AM   #30
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I wouldn't do it for a general crowd, but I agree with just saying what they want to hear. I think if you see a religious tourist group with WWJD shirts and crosses, then saying a little line about jesus here and there might help you. Last weekend was pride week here in nyc, so I spent a little time here and there to badmouth the other guy in the park that was waving a bible and trying to save their souls, they loved me, he left, and my hat had twice as much as usual.
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Old 07-05-09, 09:53 PM   #31
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Lurk

You have to be careful, I can't remember how many times I've yelled, "She's a witch! Burn Her!" and they have.
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Old 07-06-09, 06:40 PM   #32
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In Colorado Springs we have the birth place of "Focus on the Family" and New Life Church. We have talked about using the "God" thing to our advantage while performing, and came up with the solution that it was not worth it, because we need to be honest with ourselves, and it doesn't really matter if it would get us an extra few bucks.
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Old 07-07-09, 02:12 PM   #33
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Default Yea...

I've come to that conclusion as well, Lag.
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Old 11-19-11, 08:21 PM   #34
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If you want to make mega bucks you should say praise L. Ron! those scientology drones are rich as hell
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Old 07-24-12, 11:26 AM   #35
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Well, you could always appease the mormons by treating your show like a network marketing scheme... they've got BIG money.
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Old 12-11-14, 01:16 AM   #36
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Quote:
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It won't help, because the religious (and the French) don't tip...
What's the difference between a Canadian & a canoe? Canoes tip.
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