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Old 04-24-03, 08:03 PM   #1
nick nickolas
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Join Date: Dec 2000
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Posts: 528
Default Easter Show Auckland

I sit and write this review the day after the Easter Show in the cool shade of my garage, the rest of the cast of international Al Fresco performers can be viewed in the sun cleaning and a buffing my car.

A car that I had spent 2 days working on, clad in grease, oil and overalls, so the global guests could have transport while they were here.

Five of them in all, Pee Wee and Emma from Bristol, Martin Ewen from Connecticut, Lee from Australia and Hilby the Skinny German Juggle boy from New York all scrubbing and getting high on a mixture of thinners, turps and Prepsol and a product called believe it or not a product called Cum Clean.

For a lot of them this is their last day in the country.

Now I know what you are thinking “ Wow what amazing friends to buff and clean your car Nick”. Actually folks great friends!

It all started 7 days ago. The beginning of the 160th Auckland A&P Easter Show. This is a rather jolly affair involving skydivers, candy floss, stuntmen on BMX’s, ice cream sellers with wigs, chocolate covered climbing walls, a female builder called Bob, a whole pavilion full of petrol heads and their shiny machines, fluffy pedigree felines being paraded by elderly lavender haired ladies, half naked tattooed Polynesian drummers, cows, horses, sheep, pigs, pumpkins and punters ingesting a whole variety of global inedible edibles.

A lot more relaxed this year it feels, a couple of shows a day on (or near) the Fusion Stage we were told. Now the Fusion stage was a flat bed truck situated on the corner of the Arena which hosted sheep dog trials, BMX stunters, sky divers and New Zealand's strongest men.
Next to us was a miniature house dispatching smoke and children from it’s windows while the bleeping of the fire wise smoke-alarm, was not exactly the perfect setting for holding the attention of the junk food filled public.

Martin was not on at any scheduled time and just roamed at random on his metre high stilts carefully avoiding the wood chopping demonstrations
The rest of the time he was engrossed in the shooting down of enemy helicopters and camouflaged foes on his mac.

Also in the Green Room Hilby being German and therefore opposed to war would be partaking in throwing (and picking up) various objects of manual dexterity while I strummed the guitar to Pees & Em strutting around in glitter and pink, Daisy and Derek and the Bob the Builder girls drank coffee in orange overalls.
Now the coffee, there was an added bonus on the caffeine front, a bottle of Hennessey Brandy lovingly provided by Sticklebacks.

This kept us all warm especially on the 2 days it hammered down with rain.

These two days turned our pitch into a quagmire.

Daisy and Derek performed on the stage after Bob the Builder and Hilby was the support act for the Bee Gees Tribute show.
Stickleback were reduced to walkabout and the walkabout act
( Martin) stayed in his corner and continued to take over the world with weapons of mass destruction.

It seems this gig I had a close relationship with God as every performance time I had, there seemed to be a break in the weather now I don’t know whether this was the power of my magic wand or the fact that the omnipresent was blessing me for my birthday ( Easter Monday).
This unconscious control of the weather was in my favour in more ways than one.

The auxiliary car made for a fun time during the week as peoples could make the 20 min journey to my house after the show for evenings of music, songs, snacks and silliness and then tootle off back to the motel ready for their next days work.
Martin (who has claimed my couch) and I spent our mornings tidying up, drinking coffee and reading newspapers before we started up the Mazda (they have the Honda) and headed off to the show.

Now unbeknown to me my fellow comrades had decided to concoct a birthday prank on yours truly. Admittedly I was aware that something may happen considering the cast and the fact that it had been all too quiet on the prank front. but I certainly wasn’t ready for what I saw as I parked the Mazda between a couple of expensive land cruisers on that Easter Monday.

The Honda was parked across the way with taped off windows.
Wandering over thinking that they may have masked off the edges to stop rain leaks, I realised something was up when I saw the bumper was pink!.
Knowing my best form of defence was silence I kept stum, somehow though there was a leakage and they had found out Nicky had seen pink.

The idea that they had I must admit in hindsight was beautiful, to paint my car pink with fluffy dice, sequins, hearts and furry seats

.But parking the car where they did was their clownfall..

I didn’t know too much but what I did know on this Easter Monday afternoon was the lack of juggling and strutting in the green room as the blue sky turned grey and rain once again filled the showgrounds.

“ Nick, sorry it’s all gone terribly wrong” a streaky Pee Wee exclaimed as he led me into the car park a couple of hours later.

Pee Wee went on to explain, as I stared at the misadventured Mazda which looked quite frankly like it had been attacked by a menagerie of melted marshmallows

Apparently once they noticed that I had noticed something was up, this merry band of clowns changed tack and decided to ‘pink up’ the Mazda.

Hilby and Pee Wee were about to put on the 2nd coat of Acrylic water base paint when God opened the heavens.

There they were, paintbrushes in hand, smearing off splashes from the 4x4’s next door, soaking wet faces matching the pink river below as the security guards came along.

Two heavyweight Polynesian security guards, a skinny German and a glittery faced pee throwing .explanations, quotations, punctuation's accusations and statements of defence back and forth as I sat in the green room strumming away drinking brandy coffee’s.

Paint - $100, Brushes - $10, Cleaning Products - $40, Labour
( based on hourly rate of cast ) -$5000 -----Total $5150..

An expensive birthday present, and definitely one of the best as I cerebrate writing this review and watching with jocularity the day after the Easter Show in the cool shade of my garage the rest of the cast of international Al Fresco performers cleaning and a buffing my car.

Contemplating whether to take them to the hot pools later for some muscle relaxation therapy.

Nickolas
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